The Illusion of Control
by John Ortberg
One of the strongest of myths is the illusion of control. “I am in control” is not just a lie; author Ernest Becker called this the vital lie because we need it for our egos to survive. “We don’t want to admit that we are fundamentally dishonest about reality, that we do not control our lives, that we always rely on something that transcends us.” He says that man will use the power of money, or a string of sexual conquests, or relationships with important people, or a prestigious job, or his ability to learn, to make him feel that “he controls his life and death... he is a somebody—not just a trembling accident germinated on a hothouse planet that [Thomas] Carlyle for all time called a ‘hall of doom.’”

But we are not in control.

Maybe the best commentary on this particular illusion is a book on political theory by a philosopher named Dr. Seuss. It’s called Yertle the Turtle.

Yertle rules (or so he thinks) over a little pond of turtles. One day he decides his kingdom needs extending, so there went out a decree that all the turtles should be stacked up to become Yertle’s throne. The king lifts his hand, and the whole pond scrambles to obey. First dozens, then hundreds—he could see for miles.

Yertle thought his throne was as secure as a throne could be. But it came to pass that at the bottom of the turtle stack there was an obscure, powerless turtle named Mac.

“That plain little Mac did a plain little thing.He burped! And his burp shook the throne of the king!”

Yertle Augustus had a great fall. And all the king’s horses and all the king’s men could not put Yertle together again.

For the first shall be last. And everyone who exalts himself shall be humbled. Even if you’re Yertle Augustus. Even if you’re Yertle VIP, MVP, PhD, CEO, BMOC—you’re just one burp away from reality.

Often this “Master of the Board” delusion goes on until some external event that we cannot control punctures it. Max De Pree was a Fortune 500 company CEO and bestselling author who understood something about control, but when the life of his infant granddaughter was threatened, he wrote, “I’m seeing again—how often we need to learn this—that we can control only what counts for little. Eyesight, lungs, love, health, eternal life (you seem so on the edge to me) are gifts beyond my power to convey. How easy it is not to understand when we take something for granted.”

Often it is when things are going well that we are most apt to swallow the delusion that we are in control. When Israel was on the verge of entering into the Promised Land, Moses warned them: “When you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, then your heart will become proud.... You may say to yourself, ‘My power and the strength of my hands have produced this wealth for me.’ But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth.”

The reality of this world is that I was born into Someone Else’s kingdom. My life came to me as a gift I did not choose; it is suspended from a slender thread that I did not weave and cannot on my own sustain. “Many are the plans in a human heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.”

So I will need to resign as Master of the Board. The Bible’s word for this is “surrender.” I crown another to be Master—Lord—of my life. I offer my gifts, energies, resources, and heart to him.

Surrender is not passivity or abdication. It is saying yes to God and life each day. It is accepting the gifts he has given me—my body, my mind, my biorhythms, my energy. It is letting go of my envy or desire for what he has given someone else. It is letting go of outcomes that in reality I cannot accept anyway. I surrender my ambitions, my dreams, my money, my relationships, my marital status, my time, and my desires to God.

Surrender means I accept reality.

From When the Game Is Over It All Goes Back in the Box by John Ortberg